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I just thought I would share that I won temporary relocation with my children to move from Washington to Minnesota. My STBX appealed to the Judge and the Judge also granted relocation. When I was desperately looking for information, I could not find any information about how cases in court were turning out. Washington State may seem liberal for mother's but I was told by 2 of the top Washington Lawyers that temporary orders to relocate were almost impossible to win. The STBX accussed me of drugs, abuse etc. with no proof of anything. Both the Commissioner and the Judge saw through his ploy. Had he not been so contrary and lie so much in his documents, things might be different. I also know of another case where the father is much more involved than my STBX and the wife also was allowed to relocate to NY from Washington. That one is waiting on Judge Revision but the general consensus in Washington State right now is that a good mother can relocate with her children. I just want all the scared mothers to know that there is hope. My STBX will have to work within the parenting plan and won't be able to screw up our lives whenever life is not convenient for him. We will also have a chance to move forward with our lives with some family around, in a less costly environment and on our own terms. When people go from being married to divorcing, usually one person forgets that you are no longer here to serve the other person. The Judge knew I would win relocation during trial and saw nothing that STBX said had merit. I have new faith in the system. They see cases all the time and know when someone is being a fraud. The STBX self centered attitude will be a pesky bug going forward but will not be able to control our destiny. I am so grateful.

I'm glad you got what you wanted but you also need to have some sympathy for your STBX. He may turn mean because he wants to be near his children, too. The children are his kids, too and not just yours. The next step would be trying to accommodate somehow so that he can have some reasonable and meaningful contacts with the children since your children need it. Good luck.

Have you figured out the long distance parenting schedule, and how you are going to pay for it? The move away parent usually is assigned all transportation costs.

To dvd and astrolink: Your point is well noted. My STBX has been mean up to this point and I hope now that the decision is made, we both accept what is and can move forward in the best interest of the children. He is allowed the same visitation as he had here except he won't be able to have dinners on Wed. I am being very generous in the time he is allowed because it was never my intention to keep him from our children....although he tried to gain full custody with me only having supervised visits with the children 2 days per month. I understand he was trying to prevent me from relocation but his allegations will make it very difficult for me to EVER trust him. He is allowed 2 weekends per month. And I will always try to give him the kids minor school Holidays. He is paying for his own travel. He is very wealthy. We don't have a final parenting plan but it may include a 90/10 split but after hearing the Judge on Friday, maybe not. The Judge seems to have less tolerance for him at this point.

One more thing I offered during court was web-cam visits and the Commissioner liked the idea and granted 2 visits per week. I think that might be a good way for the kids to remain close to their father. The very unfortunate thing that will most likely occur as it did when we lived 1 miles from him - he will not show up, not give notice and cancel many visits. In some ways, he has enough rope to hang himself but he can make beautiful knots if he chooses. But, alas, that is for him to decide. He likes to make a lot of noise but not follow through on much.

Did he exercise his visitation with his children on a regular basis?

Very sad, whatever his relationship with you, the children are sure going to miss out. You say he still gets to keep his regular visitation..I assume it was an every other weekend kind of thing...Reality is...how is that going to work long distance? Are the kids going to travel to him? Or does he have to visit them in a hotel?

Sounds like a sucky deal in terms of parenting...but great for you

I agree and it does suck for my children. We are moving in the next two weeks, STBX has the kids now on a 2 week visit before we leave. My children are very young 5 and 7...they can not fly unaccompanied. He will have to travel to see his kids...although the Judge will allow him to pick the kids up and travel with him out of state 1x per month. He was the one that wanted 2x visits per month and I wouldn't dream of stopping him. I hope he can do it. The flight is over 6 hours with a connection so it is not in the best interest of the children to have them flying 24 hours and 2 time zones for a 60 hour weekend with their Dad. Although he is capable of making this decision with no regard to the kids. The Judge said if the kids suffer, the trips out of state will have to stop. My children love and need their father. I tried to work with him for 10 months in Collaborative before I filed to leave. He had many chances to keep his children near but thinks punishing me is separate from punishing his kids. I do not feel sorry for him. It is the classic problem of not seeing the forest through the trees. If we could have stayed here and there was ANY indication he would do what he said he would, I would not be leaving. I know the importance of having 2 parents nearby. I would love to have a break from being a full time parent - even if it is only 2 weekends per month. I am just not willing to live my life under his terms, that is a boundary issue for me and I want our children to know how to treat and be treated by others. In the end, you teach people how to treat you. I just stuck up for myself. We both got to choose.

What part of Minnesota are you moving to? Do you have a job lined up? Employment opportunities here right now are terrible. The only thing that is good financially is the welfare system is extremely generous here.

I am going back to school for the next few years. I am fortunate. The unemployment in Washington is actually worse than Minnesota with a much large cost of living.
Thanks.

An Unaccompanied Minor is a child who is at least five years old and younger than 12 years old and who will be traveling without someone who is 12 years old or older.

My kids were flying unaccomanied at that age.....I'm not sure what cities you are in...but there are nonstop flights btwn seattle and msp...if the parents are willing to drive to these airports to facilitate visitation