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#217223 - 04/26/09 09:53 AM
My ex in contempt again!!!
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Member
Registered: 11/20/07
Posts: 19
Loc: Alabama
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I don't know what to do....my ex has abandoned his son, ignoring his calls, ignoring his birthday and Christmas. He was previously in contempt for $1400 in "alimony" which was really him paying me back for what I put into his home from selling my home during our marriage. He was also in contempt for $700 in out of pocket medical expenses for child, not counting the money he owed to doctors and hospitals for copay's. I used my back disability to carry him to court for the contempt and have the visitation modified, since he had abandoned the child and had not paid or visited in two years. The court did not find him in contempt though it did find he owed all that I was asking and was ordered to pay, in the same fashion he was originally ordered to pay...$100 a month until he paid the total of $1800 (which was then $1400)of the "alimony" and that he was to immediately pay the medical bills. He did not do this as ordered but he did eventually pay, just to turn around and ignore it again. He is now in contempt again and has been for another two years. I can not afford to hire another attorney. The attorney I originally hired had allowed my ex to be in default for over 6 months, not answering our petition in the allowed time. He also was very unprofessional and I could have filed a complaint with the State Bar and should have but was going through so much at the time. I do not know what to do, all I know is that my son does not deserve this and its very hard for us to survive. We don't even feel the affects of the economy because we already had nothing! What can I do, short of representing myself and loosing it in court?
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#217225 - 04/26/09 10:01 AM
Re: My ex in contempt again!!!
[Re: aphotoangel]
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Member
Registered: 11/20/07
Posts: 19
Loc: Alabama
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I want to add that he claimed in court he had paid a medical bill ordered in our divorce that he agreed to pay, of $500. He claimed in court that morning that he had paid right before court. My attorney, nor the judge asked to see proof nor did they call and check on the matter. The bill was not paid and I am the one being threatened and having to deal with all the phone calls. Is there any real, caring, good lawyers that remember that they should help less fortunate? If not me, then for a child who has been abandoned, carried to court by his biological father to resolve his rights, to be adopted years later by a "christian" man who turns around and does the exact same thing. Not only was he screwed by his father but the system, the judge and the lawyers of both parties! I was warned this judge was one to rule in the "mans favor", which I didn't think true, but I do now. But to have the Lawyer, Mr. Quinn, in Anniston to turn around and do that to his own client???? He even left for a trip for a month for reserves. I hired him in May and the trip was in October, not once during our interview did he mention this, and that he would just leave things in a mess with no one to cover his legal matters.
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#218783 - 05/17/09 10:11 AM
Re: My ex in contempt again!!!
[Re: BeaverFever]
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Member
Registered: 11/20/07
Posts: 19
Loc: Alabama
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He is not arrears for CS, it comes out of his check. He is now behind around $1000, plus the attorney I hired to carry him for contempt previously, left it where I have to go back to court about college and child support matters pertaining to after he graduates (at 17years old). We went to court in 2007 for contempt and to modify....due to my ex abandonment and refusal to speak to or take his visitation days. My son had an A grade point average, test done by a psychologist showing he has a high IQ, yet MY ATTORNEY, decided that college was premature to bring up, with my son almost in 11th grade.
Now I have him in contempt, still, not again, still... And College, he graduates in two weeks.....
What happened with the law that attorney's were to help those who could not afford one? They cut out legal aide, but the attorney's who get their retainer and put in an interest bearing account, are they not to use that interest to help less fortunate ones?
Maybe instead of asking who can tell me where to get help for my son....I should be asking "what can I do to change this situation? What can I do to help make a place, a law, to change this matter?
Women and Men (a lot of men, now days, women are beginning to be the ones to abandon the children) are being left to bare the entire burden of parenting a child, and to raise and teach this child life, right and wrong....
We, the single parents, the already below poverty line minimum wage workers or disabled, are then stuck with choosing to feed, shelter, clothe our children,and get them medical care or to hire an attorney to get a Judge to make this other parent be responsible.... Then you have the chance of the Judge not doing his job and making that parent responsible, then you have a greedy lawyer who then "drags" out the process where you need to hire him back to get anything done.
I requested that it be in my paper's that if my ex is in contempt, a police can arrest him, then he gets his day in court. I explained I would not be able to afford to carry him back to court.
This problem alone could help with our economic problems....If the other parent was made to at least financially do his part or GO TO JAIL AND STAY IN JAIL, then mom's could afford daycare to work, medication for the child, so she doesn't miss work, get it yet? She could afford housing, instead of living off the government, food instead of foodstamps. Don't give me the he needs a job to pay support, if he isn't paying then he doesn't need that job.
My son is having to work 30hrs a week and attend high school....his senior year at that. This is his first job, he has had it for a year and a half, employee of the month, and offered a manager's job there, when he graduates (and in August when he turns 18). He had to get this job to help pay his senior fee's, his extra's (like razors, deodorant, yeah those are luxuries), pay the insurance for him to drive our car....He literally goes to school comes in takes a 15 min nap, gets up throws on work clothes and goes to work, closes, then comes home unwinds, then goes to bed to start all over again...he didn't go out on prom night, he went to the prom then came straight home, to rest because he had to work the next day. We do not get food stamps because they count my child's income, so he helps with groceries and electric. I am disabled, I have rods and pins in my back, I draw a check but not enough to raise a child on. He made a 24 on his ACT the first try, without even studying or practicing for the test....
This was explained to the judge: My son can not get his medications...his father has insurance on the minor. You have to pay for the medications up front, then file with his insurance to get a refund, BUT they will only send the check to the policy holder, my son's father. If I have the money to pay for his meds and I send him the receipts (or fill out the forms for the insurance for him) my spouse will get the check and keep the money. He does not have eye care for my son, so if I use rent or grocery money to get my son's eyes checked (required for him, every year)and his contacts hoping that my ex will send back the money, as ordered...we go without because he refuses to pay it back. Do you know why? Because he knows I can not do anything about it. I can not afford to carry him back to court, just to have the judge, my attorney and whoever else, turn around and just let him go. It's a $30 copay for my son to see the doctor, my spouse is responsible for paying.....
What can I do to make awareness, change the laws and make this more of a priority in helping, and changing this so that our children and the parents who are man, or woman enough to be parents can get help??????
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#218784 - 05/17/09 10:15 AM
Re: My ex in contempt again!!!
[Re: aphotoangel]
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Member
Registered: 11/20/07
Posts: 19
Loc: Alabama
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He makes over $15 an hour, working for the water company, driving around in a truck, reading meters, which he now doesn't even have to get out of his car to read....
He doesn't have a house payment, he owns his home....has for years... He doesn't have a car payment, his is paid off by now...
There is no reason for him to do this....
He has problems handling his money, it was even suggested in court that he go to financial counsel of some type, because he gets himself in trouble buying credit and not paying....
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