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I had been amrried for 18 yrs. when my husband walked out on me and 2 kids. He was gone for 4 months before we ever got a court date. In that time he never gave anything to the kids in support. I have been a stay at home mom except for 8 months of that marriage, at his request, that he didn't want a day care raising his kids. I love my kids very much and that was never a problem for me. My husband made enough money for us to live very comfortably. His income is over $50,000.00/yr. We had no bills except utilities and the basics like that. We paid as we went for everything. At our court date, our attorneys agreed that he would pay $2000.00/month in child support and alimony. We never saw the judge, but he did see the agreement that was reached between us and our attorneys. Ny husband at that point ask that it be made tmporary for the months of Feb. and March until he could get his finances in order. He has paid as he was supposed to, but now that we are into March he is constantly harrassing me saying that I better enjoy it because at the end of March he is not giving me another dime except for child support. Our attorneys agreed that I would continue to receive the support until I got my degree, I have never been to college, but have always dreamed of teaching special needs children. I am finally going to realize that dream at 38 yrs old I can continue to get the support from him. He is an over the road trucker and was never home with me or the kids and I feel like except for the money part that I raised our kids by myself. My lawyer seems pretty confident that the support will continue. I am just so tired of the control that he has always had over my life, and he is still doing it even though he lives in another county. I totally agreed to give up the aloimny afer the 4 yrs. just enough time for me to finish school and be able to support myself and my kids, and by that time, I will have a daughter in college also and my son will be a freshman in high school. Any help or advice that you guys could give me would be helpful.I am just so afraid at this point, and he seems like he has it all figured out, and I am a basket case not knowing which way to turn.

Document his threats, record them if it's legal and keep copies of all checks before you deposit them. A journal is going to be your best friend. Documenting a pattern of behavior whether it's good or bad is your best defense. Every single threat, conversation, mean behavior, etc will hurt him. Be prepared to take your journal to court. I've heard judges actually read them if they're having trouble deciding who is lying.

Support can be garnished out of his wages so he doesn't get an option about paying it. After so many years being an OTR driver he doesn't have the skills to work "under the table" and support himself. If he chooses that route, the judge will just impute his income based on history. He will still be required to pay the ordered amount or go to jail.

If you feel your attorney is doing a good job then trust his judgement. Thats what you're paying him for. Under no circumstances should you quit school. I didn't get my Associate's degree until I was 45. You're a spring chicken - graduating at 38 - you lucky girl!

You feel like you raised your kids because you did. I used to tell everyone I was a Married Single Parent, and I was. My X made over $94k in his day job and just for the heck of it decided to take a part time job too. We had no need whatsoever for the money.

He only controls you if you let him - so quit allowing him to make or break your day. Think of him as invisible. When my X is around picking up the kids or whatever I don't even make eye contact with him. No point, he ceases to exist for me. If he wants to have a conversation with me he has to email me. I'm not rude or hateful. I just don't say a word and go on about my business as if he is not in the room. He isn't there for me, he's there for his kids. He can make small talk with them. Try it, it's a lot easier than you think.

Hang in there and have a great week! :-)