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My stbx husband and I are currently in the process of mediation. the divorce should be final by Aug. We have a 2 year old and a 4 year old. We have a cruise booked in Novemeber. He has a cabin reserved for him and his dad and I have an adjoining cabin reserved for me and my 2 kids. We have previously traveled on a cruise with this type of cabin arrangement. My stbx is telling me that he isn't going to consent to me going. we will have joint custody. His reasons are he is afraid the kids will fall off the ship and the kids will be starting preschool 2 months before and I shouldnt take them out of a new school for this. And....he thinks its financially irresponsible following divorce. Neither of us will be hurting for money. I am pretty sure he is just doing this to be a pia. I know I cant go if he doesnt consent. If he doesn't what do I do go to court? What do you think a judge would say? Thanks

[quote]His reasons are he is afraid the kids will fall off the ship [/quote] <<<<Is he that negligent?? Are you?? He's kidding right? Because with that logic, then the kids should be encased in a cotton box and locked in a vault lest they fall down the stairs, drown in the tub, get eaten by the dog, choke on a french fry or get abused by the preschool teacher!>>>> [quote]and the kids will be starting preschool 2 months before and I shouldnt take them out of a new school for this. [/quote] <<<Its just preschool, which is just a feel good way to call daycare! Never heard of anyone being penalized for NOT taking their kids to daycare and <horrors> actually wanting to spend some quality family time together. SHEESH, tell him to stop acting like such a wuss!>>> [quote]I am pretty sure he is just doing this to be a pia. I know I cant go if he doesnt consent. If he doesn't what do I do go to court? What do you think a judge would say? Thanks [/quote] <<<PIA? Sounds more like he has a new honey and would rather bring her along! Are the tickets paid for? If so then the crying poverty bit won't work. Take it to court, it will cost him more in attorneys fees than the cruise itself and he'll look like a jerk in front of the judge. Good luck. Enjoy your trip. >>>

Why do you think you can't go if he doesn't consent? We live in the U.S. of A. You can go anywhere you please without his consent. If he paid for the cabins and has them reserved in his name, that might be different, but if your name is on your cabin, tell him to take a flying leap. Is it out of the country, maybe, and he has to give you consent to take the kids? I'm just trying to imagine why you would need his permission.

Zeebabester...I've seen a ton of your posts...and you're amazing! I love em. You make so much sense. We went to the mediator tonight....and I keep forgetting to bring up this cruise issue until it's too late and we are walking out the door. But she said since our divorce will be over by aug 1st and the cruise isnt until nov...we should just consult our separate attorneys when we get a final review of our agreement. I dont get the point in all that. Any attorney I go to is going to say...lets go to court....you should win....and I end up paying money and the stbx is gonna pay money. I don't see why this can't get resolved during mediation. If I have to go to court and blow a bunch of money I am going to do it because he's not going to control my life. And to whichever one of his "friends" that reads this post and reports back to him. WHASSSUUUUP!!!! BeaverFever....in order to travel outside the country with joint custody I need his approval. Someone tell me why the courts think that people who are getting divorced can discuss stuff like rational people and come to a mutual agreement???? Aren't we getting divorced for a reason. I actually told him he should bring his girlfriend...ill bring a "friend" and we can all hang out and take turns watching the kids. Isnt that nice of me?? He said its too weird. I said bring ear plugs. HAHAHAHAHA I love myself.

If the two of you booked the cruise in November with the understanding that the kids would go, then I would simply take the kids and claim that the consent was given previously and that it's implied by the fact that spaces were purchased for them. Let him take you to court over it.

When my teenage daughter went on a cruise with a friend and her parents the cruiseline required notarized permission from both parents. If you end up having to duel this out, it could be costly and not quickly resolved. Consider getting some travel insurance to cover your trip costs if you don't get to take the cruise. I'm not sure they cover situations like this. I would be considering other vacation options if he is going to continue his pia stance. Good luck.

Ok, everyone here is such a know-it-all. JenJen29 doesnt seem to realize if you take two kids (who are 2 and 4yrs old btw) OUT OF THE COUNTRY it is not just a "little trip" --anyone ever go on a cruise and go on the little cars up the mountains 1 lane roads? Ever try and watch 2 kids running around...do you people lack common sense or what? Lets see, its easy for the kids to drown/get killed/fall off a cliff or get run over in those places REAL EASY--ive been there before. so also, when you have "JOINT-CUSTODY" it means that you need permission by the other party for these things. And No lawyer is just gonna say "go ahead its no big deal take them!". Hey cassandra above seems to have common-sense and the cruiselines do too...why do you think they REQUIRE notarized permission from BOTH ---BOTH parents. Also anyone who thinks its a good idea to bring new "internet-boyfriends" or girlfriends on trips after they are divorced with small children PROBABLY needs their head-examined OR at the least a visit from DCYS for them to examine what type of environment they are creating for their small-children. Sickening and Pathetic

It sounded to me like JenJen was joking about taking friends/girlfriends along. I didn't see anything sickening and pathetic in her posts. There are people who will take kids out of the country and away from US jurisdiction for evil purposes, thus the legal requirements (trying hard not to mention Anna Nicole Smith...lol.) Bottom line is both parents have to agree. I've had some experience in Caribbean islands with my children. No, it's a not the US. It's a different world out there. But.... our family had the most memorable experience and we will probably do it again. Definitely preferable to the safety of keeping them locked up in a box. There are some activities that would not work well for travel with small children, but that applies to anyplace you travel. I suspect her ex is simply trying to be a pia. Hopefully things will calm down and she gets to have a fun vacation with the kids.

He (ALCT) is the ex...HAHAHAHAHAHA ridiculous

[quote=jenjen29]He (ALCT) is the ex...HAHAHAHAHAHA ridiculous [/quote] Yep, (I suspected as much)... and a pia one at that. Good luck. ALCT... Legally you can do what you are attempting. But why not try to work with your ex for the benefit of your child. If you make everything a fight it hurts everyone. Your arguments against the child taking this trip sound bitter and foolish.